Grocery delivery man: (spoken in an Eastern European accent) You order much toilet paper.
Me: We use a lot of it.
Grocery delivery man: How many people live here?
Me: Soon there will be four children.
Grocery delivery man: Oh and you are American?
Me: Yes, I am.
Grocery delivery man: You are small to be American and have so many children.
Me: Thank you (I think).
Grocery delivery man: I have one son same age as your boy. My wife has let herself go. Says impossible after having children. What is your secret?
Me: Good genetics and I try not too eat too much.
Grocery delivery man: That must be it. I tell my wife not to eat too much.
I say good luck with all that and do not tell her where I live!
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